Friday, June 24, 2011

awkward stage

Hi baby... I'm praying for you at this very moment. I been having a mild contraction these past few days and is currently suffering for some lower back pain, I hope you don't feel the pain and you're just fine. 

Anyway, I took some pictures of me early this morning...Look at your mommy! I gone so big since we arrived here at Aklan. I change a lot and I look like more of a giant whale today. "Balyena!" haha... I'm feeling ugly too.

Some of my friends keep on asking me if its going to be a twin, but an ultrasound revealed (from the very start) there’s only one little angel inside my tummy so that only means you are really big. Or perhaps I really gained a lot of weight. Either way, the fact that this only means you had fully grown by now, despite having two more months left, is a good feeling.

Again, I still have two more months to take pleasure with the moments of having you inside me. This pregnancy is really amazing and is something I would never trade for anything. I am still thankful for those great moments like the day of the first glimpse, the day I realized a little creature invades my system (who is obviously going to be the most wonderful), the first time I heard of your heartbeat and feeling the first movements. Well, Every moment is actually worth remembering but those are the "first times" that I felt so proud of myself because I know you're alive.

Today is another wonderful day.. another glimpse of you. You are so adorable.I finally saw you on the monitor and you have fully grown and a well-defined baby. You got your eyes, nose, lips. chin, head, extremities, spine. So relieved, although we still don't know your gender, your Dad and I are very happy that you are perfectly fine.I guess you are one conservative little angel that you prefer not to show us your gender, you are trying to hide it with your lower limbs. :) I'm taking it as a surprise for us.

Too bad, the picture isn't look like the one I saw.I want to show your daddy how adorable you are.

Anyway, I'm sorry I named this blog "Charlotte" because I want to believe that we are having a princess in you. but if I'm wrong, don't worry because my love will remain just the same. Rest assured that I will never be disappointed on whatever you will be. I am actually thinking to name you with "Christopher" if you're a boy. 

30 weeks and 2 days AOG, ~1.840 grams, 158bpm, Grade II posteriorly implanted, EDD on August 30, 2011
You might wonder of what my prayers is all about. I am on a pre-term labor again. It saddened me and again I'm scared that you'll be harmed. I don't know if its me, is something wrong with me. I felt sorry for this.

I am excited to see you but please not so soon. I'm still willing to wait. Having you this early is a complete risk for your health and there is a tendency of losing you. I don't want that to happen. I always wanted to watch you grow, to run after you, to be there on the first of your school, to be the most proud mom in all your achievements, I want to guide you, to protect you, to support your life. So please be strong. We want you.

So right now, I am again confined to bed rest and I have to undergo medications that will delay further contractions perhaps even until the 34th week. but it will be good if I could deliver you in exact term.

I'm praying for you. I Love you Forever!!

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